Fishing And Faith

I love being around water. In fact, it's a part of my most treasured memories. In my mind, I can go back even now to the 1960s, lying on an feather stuffed matress . . .

It was four o’clock in the morning and my granddaddy is leaning over me trying to coax me out of the bed where I slept. As a child, I was a hard sleeper, especially at that time of the morning. "Get up son, we’re going fishing!" 

Sleepily I stumble to my feet and put on my clothes. That would be the last time he would ever have difficulty getting me out of bed to go fishing with him. I was about to meet a mistress who would capture my heart for a lifetime.

We drive the ninety minutes from Savannah, GA to Pomona Lake. My cousins, Eddie and Mike, are crammed into the front seat with my granddaddy and me. The back windows in his blue Plymouth Valiant are rolled down. Bamboo poles wrapped with lines and adorned with red and white floats stick out of the car. The back seat is filled with trot lines wrapped around square wooden frames. There is a big galvanized tub in the trunk of the car to bring home the treasures we will pull in from beneath the still waters of the lake. An adult man may earn a lot of money in his lifetime, but one has to be a young boy to possess this kind of wealth.

After arriving at the lake and setting our trot lines in the water, we return to our campsite at the water’s edge. The crickets, frogs and katydids who welcomed us a few hours earlier are now hushed by their anticipation of dawn. In those ephemeral moments which are neither night nor day, we four sit together on the dock talking and laughing and waiting for the sun.

Our conversation might appear to be superficial to the casual observer, but something is happening at a deeper level that took me many years to understand. In that isolated setting at those moments in time, we shared our lives together. It was communion pieced together not through words, but a union forged by three young cousins receiving unconditional love from their granddaddy. We had nothing to offer in that context except our childlike ability to receive from a man who found great joy in sharing himself with his offspring.

That interaction pictures the essence of our walk with Christ. It isn’t the rote prayers we mindlessly recite which connects us to God. Nor does our religious activity join us to him any more than three boys trying to fish bound them to their granddaddy. It is the willingness to simply receive his unconditional love. There will be both words and actions, but the essence of the relationship is in our receiving all that He offers.

We had no resources to offer our granddaddy when we fished. We ran over trot lines with the trolling motor. We tangled our fishing lines. We turned over the minnow bucket. We dropped his reel into the lake. It was quite obvious that our granddaddy just wanted our company, not our abilities. (That’s how it is between God and you.)

With the rising of the sun we boarded our little fishing boat and with the help of a small trolling motor inched our way toward the trot lines. We were seldom disappointed when we checked the lines. "Look at it! It’s a big as a baby!" my Granddaddy exclaimed as if were the first time in his life he had seen a big fish.

Four decades later, I still smile about it - not the big fish, but his response to sharing the experience with us. I’m sure he wouldn’t have reacted the same way if he had caught the fish while he was alone. He took pleasure in our joy while himself being the catalyst, if not the very source of our joy at that moment.

I have come to discover that same quality in my heavenly Father. He often takes me to the place of blessing, sets me in the right place to be blessed, baits the hook, tells me to pull in the blessing and then becomes deliriously happy right along with me as I enjoy the benefits He has provided! On days I don’t catch any fish, nothing changes between Him and myself. Catching fish may be my priority, but just being with me is His.

I didn’t know in those days that God was beginning to teach me about Himself through the water, my granddaddy and my cousins. Of the four of us, two have since gone on to heaven, but I’ll never forget the elements of an authentic life that began to be gently laid within me in those days.

I must admit that the days of youth are gone. Now I’m a man rushing toward the 60 year mark. I battle lower back pain and an expanding waistline. Many years have passed since the intuitive insight gleaned at that lake has become actual knowledge in my mind, but the matrix for understanding unconditional love was partially formed there. Thanks, granddaddy.

Will you pause as you finish this article and reflect on the great love your heavenly Father has for you? You bring Him great pleasure. What He wants more than anything from you is just you!  Don’t worry about how many fish you catch or how many times you knock the minnow bucket over in the boat. Those aren’t the big issues to Him. He just wants you to enjoy being with Him. Your Father has an exciting journey awaiting you, so just relax and enjoy the day He has planned.

To Be Like Jesus?

Back in the day when I tried to be like Jesus, I felt like a spiritual failure most of the time. It was a caricature of me trying to be Him.  Then a time came when I realized I don't have to try to be like Jesus. It's too draining. Besides, I am like Jesus. I am one with Him. We live in union.

That reality suggests something even harder to conceive: Jesus looks like Steve too. Jesus living out life through a 58 years old guy, who in this single week has been a physically challenged, Sarah McLachlan loving, James Bond Watching, Mannheim Steamroller concert attending, groaning, complaining and feelings scared guy, then laughing and loving and trusting God.

The way I am hardwired - my humor, personality type,my love for words, both thinking about them and profusely expressing them, my mix of sometimes gentle encouragement and sometimes bowl-you-over "prophetic opinions," my deeply pensive moods and my times of laughing with my wife, children and grandchildren until we're all crying.  It's just me. It's just Him. Although I drop the ball on my end sometimes, we make a good pair. Jesus/Steve: Now Appearing Together Daily.

No, I don't have a Messiah complex. Just some insight into an eternal reality that is just as true or you as it is me. It's true of you. IT IS TRUE OF YOU. Own it. Really, act like it's real (because it is) and watch what happens. I dare you to write me after a month and tell me you don't see a difference. It will be a good difference too. An understanding of identity and union that will blow your mind and change your life. Sound New-Agey? Well, it sort of it, but not the way you might think. The better description would be New Covenant. Or to quote the Apostle Paul: "Christ in you, the hope of glory"

It Is Thanksgiving And I Am Thankful

 

Yes, I am thankful. I am thankful for…

A loving God whose ways are so far above my thoughts and understanding that I never tire of exploring His depths. I can say with honesty that at this point in my life few things actually lift me to a place of transcendence anymore. Sometimes great music will do it. Occasionally, a good play or film can do it.  However, there are many times I often literally feel the thrill of citizenship privileges in His kingdom as revelation that produces overwhelming transcendence settle into the space within my spirit and mind. It is at those moments more than ever that I realize I am not created for this world. It really is just a stopover.

A loving wife with whom I have shared the most intimate matters of life for almost 43 years. We dated for three and in July will be married 40 years. I know her and she knows me. None but my Creator know me in greater authenticity and intimacy. Yet, like Him she loves me with a depth that nurtures fresh life into me at every moment. When she lays her hand on my head at night as we lie in bed, I feel the hand of Jesus. There is no other way to describe it. It’s miraculous. What did I ever do to get this woman???

Four children whose hearts are “after God’s own heart.” My oldest, Andrew, is compassionate, kind, wise and an avid student of eternal truth. He is the son I pray with when I want prayer. My oldest daughter, Amy, wanted to be a missionary when she was a child. Now as a mother of three, husband on one and friend of many, I’d give her my vote for “Missionary of the Year” any year, every year. Her transparency, vulnerability, authenticity and boldness for Christ is unrivaled by anybody I know. She is the child I talk to when I want wise input. My youngest son, David, is passionate, articulate, visionary and resolved to live the dream God placed in his heart.  He is the child I talk to when I want encouragement that makes me believe again. My youngest daughter, Amber, is gentle-hearted, caring, affectionate, and verbally affirming. She volunteered for Hospice just to have an outlet to show love. She’s the child I talk to when I need loving words.

My son-in-law, Cliff, is a wonderful gift to us. I think he's the best Dad I've ever known in my life. Much better than either I or my Dad were. And he loves my daughter more than his own life. What man wouldn't love a son-in-law like that. Son -in-law, huh? No, I'm not under the law on this. Cliff is another son in this family. That's just how it is.


Jessica - the new Mrs. McVey in our family. Married three weeks now to my son, David. I've loved Jessica since I met her. How can a man not love a woman who loves his own son so much? They adore each other like you'd think newlyweds would. Jess is a nurse and has the heart for it. And the best thing I love about her right now? She loves little fat babies. That's what she said. My son, David, agrees. That agreement points to a hopeful future for this old man who is ready for his fourth grandchild. (Right now only Amy and Cliff have children.)  Jessica is the kind of girl I knew David would marry - kind, gentle, caring, funny, emotional and madly in love with him. I look forward to a lifetime ahead with her.

And what man in his right mind can fail to acknowledge grandchildren? I have three who brighten my life more than they could possibly imagine at their ages. Hannah just turned 15 last week. She is beautiful – in every way. She has a great sense of humor and a wisdom that is beyond her years. From the moment I laid eyes on her when she was born, I find it impossible not to smile like I’ve won the lottery every time I lay eyes on her. Jonathan is twelve. With a mild form of autism called Asperger’s Syndrome, he is the quintessential boy with that challenge. Unlike some with his giftedness, he is very outgoing – extremely affectionate, very talkative, laughs at his own jokes even if others don’t and is completely hilarious without even trying to be. He gives great hugs and can remember where an insignificant item was placed two years ago. He is indeed a gift to our family. Jeremy is our youngest grandson. At eleven, he loves sports and is a seriously good baseball player. He pitches a mean fastball and does well as a catcher too. The highlights of our weeks are watching him play ball. He is an exceptionally bright child and is loving and articulate. The important thing to remember here is that I am not at all prejudiced about my grandchildren. Not all all.

My younger sister, Jan, is my only sibling and is the most authentic Christian I’ve ever known. Our parents are in heaven and I’ve known Jan longer than any other person still in this world. She is real, with no pretension at all.   She’s at one time an explosive bundle of laughter, compassion, love, poise, spirited opinions and mystical experiences which have forged her into a New Covenant “Jan the Baptist” who many aren’t sure wouldn’t actually eat wild locusts on a dare but are sure she’d be willing to be beheaded for the Christ she loves. I want to be more like Jan when I grow up, even though she is six years younger than me.

My friends are an eclectic group of people consisting of wild-eye-charistmatics and staunchy-liturgicals; rabid Republicans and dazed Democrats, millionaires and Medicaid recipients, people who shout “That’s right!!!” when I teach and others who whisper, “God, help him!” when they hear some of the things I say.

Some have moved in closer to me this year and others have become strangely quiet. Some I know well, intimately well. Well enough they could hurt me with others if they told everything they know.  They’ve seen me at my worst and still love and accept me. Some I’m getting to know better and enjoying it after meeting through ministry opportunities. We’re trusting each other more and more as time passes. Some are Internet connections but they truly are friends. They’ve encouraged me, prayed for me, written me in private and dialogued with me. I don’t know what else to call them but “friends” and I hope that word will have increasing meaning for them and me in the days ahead.

I’m thankful for my Grace Walk Team. These guys actually threw in with me to do something that from the beginning has run great risks. Their gospel and my gospel is the same gospel. They go with boldness, sharing with vulnerability yet boldness what God has put in their hearts. Contrary to what the public tends to think about people in ministry, they fret and pray and worry and trust and wonder and believe that their financial needs will be met. Just enough to pay the bills this month. They all, without exception have seen their personal income decrease this year, but here they are – ready to turn around and do it again this next year. There is no team of people involved in any ministry that I love or respect more. They aren’t only colleagues. They are friends, partners, and confidants. They are family.    

Yes, I’m thankful. In the ups and downs of life I’ve faced lately, it is this list of God-given assets that have sustained me. It is these who make me love, laugh, hope, believe and anticipate a future that can only be designed by Pure Love Himself.

Dead Cats

Martha then said to Jesus, "Lord, if You had been here,

my brother would not have died (John 11:21).

I recently read a story about a little boy whose pet cat was killed one day while he was in school. His mother was very concerned about how he would take the news. When he got home, she explained what happened. The little boy turned away and began to cry. "Don't worry," the mother said reassuringly. "He's in heaven with God now." The little boy whirled on his mother and with desperation and anger in his voice yelled, "What's God gonna do with a dead cat?"

That's how we all feel sometimes, don't we? We know God has the situation in His hands, but from our perspective the outcome seems final and the whole thing appears to have a finality to it that is completely unacceptable to us. Despite the fact that we know it’s in His hands, we want to scream, "What's God gonna do with a dead cat?!" In other words, "Why did it have to end this way?"

Mary and Martha felt the same desperation when they buried their brother, Lazarus. Martha spoke for all of us during the times when our crisis doesn't seem to end with a miracle, but with a misery that screams despair into our emotions and thoughts. Martha said, "Lord, if you had been here!" Do you feel that way about situations in your life? Does it seem like there have been times when Jesus wasn’t in town when you needed Him the most?

At times it is impossible to understand the divine reasoning behind God’s actions or, more often it seems, His lack of visible action in our circumstances. In John 11, the Bible shows that Mary and Martha faced this very dilemma.

The text says, “Now a certain man was sick, Lazarus of Bethany, the village of Mary and her sister Martha. It was the Mary who anointed the Lord with ointment, and wiped His feet with her hair, whose brother Lazarus was sick. So the sisters sent word to Him, saying, "Lord, behold, he whom You love is sick." But when Jesus heard this, He said, "This sickness is not to end in death, but for the glory of God, so that the Son of God may be glorified by it." Now Jesus loved Martha and her sister and Lazarus. So when He heard that he was sick, He then stayed two days longer in the place where He was. Then after this He said to the disciples, "Let us go to Judea again."

The reasoning of Jesus in waiting two more days before coming to Bethany makes perfect sense to us now, since we know the whole story. God received greater glory by raising Lazarus from the death than he would have by healing him. That possibility wasn’t one that would have occurred to these two sisters at all so how could it make sense to them? All they could see was that Jesus wasn’t coming through for them when they needed Him the most.

We all feel like these two at times, don’t we? You may have faced situations in your life where you have struggled to understand why your prayers about the matter seemed to be ignored. It seemed to you that, at a time when you most needed divine intervention, God was inactive.

In moments like that it is important to remember that your perspective is limited to what you can see at the moment. Mary and Martha couldn’t imagine how their situation could possibly have a good ending, but God had one in mind all along. You can be assured that the same God who raised Lazarus from the dead is fully aware of your problems.

From your finite understanding you too may not be able to imagine how your situation could possibly end well, but remember this: You don’t see things from the eternal perspective. Your Father does, so trust Him. He has not forgotten nor is He ignoring you.

There actually is an answer to the question, "What's God gonna do with a dead cat?" He may resurrect it. Dead things don't deter God. He can put life right back into something that is already dead. Hope isn't gone just because a situation appears to have ended.

God may not resurrect it, but may instead redeem it. In other words, He will use the disappointments and devastations of our lives to accomplish a greater purpose. We don't know what's good and what's bad for us. Only He does. What we do know is that our Father loves us. He isn't sadistic, but gently and tenderly loves us at all times. Never do we need to believe that more than when life makes no sense.

When circumstances spiral downward and God doesn't step in to change them, He can use the outcome in a positive way. We don't have to see how He plans to use it for that fact to be true. Faith means that we trust Him even when our senses tell us all hope is gone.

Our faith is in our God, period. Faith doesn’t require believing that we will get what we want. Instead, it knows that we get what God wants and it is being willing to accept that and rest in it even if our emotions and thoughts argue.

So, “what's God gonna do with a dead cat?” Whatever He wants. His role is to be in charge. Ours is to trust.

This blog is a devotional from my book, The Grace Walk Devotional, to be released by Harvest House Publishers Feb 1. To preorder the book and receive it in January, click here: www.gracewalkresources.com